The film may be technically competent in places, but the uninteresting characters with their absurdly convenient dark secrets and the puzzling presentation make the movie forgettable.
BLOOD RUNS COLD (2011)
Looking for a mindless 80 minutes of formulaic hack and slash? ... “Blood Runs Cold” has that covered. But seen too many 1980’s slasher retreads that lack creativity or entertainment value beyond a few gory kills? Move along. There is definitely nothing to see here.
THE HAUNTING OF HELENA (2012)
“The Haunting of Helena” is an average ghost story that is heavy on atmosphere, but light on resonating chills. High production values serve up platefuls of style, except the entrees are reheated leftovers of tropes and scares culled from footprints of the haunt-loaded horrors that came before it.
V/H/S/2 (2013)
“V/H/S/2” is a rare film in that the sum of its parts supersedes the average portions of the individual segments. The final verdict is that the total package provides 90 minutes of horror entertainment.
THE MANSON FAMILY (2003)
“The Manson Family” movie is as erratic, disturbing, uninhibited, and fueled by as much hallucinogenic imagery as the actual Manson Family itself.
THE PURGE (2013)
Once the premise is accepted for what it is, the film finds a way to make its mark as both class separation commentary and as a home invasion thriller.
PRANK (2013)
Even with several bullet points in the “Pros” column, it is a shame that the “Cons” of “Prank” end up on a longer list.
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD: RESURRECTION (2012)
Twenty minutes into the film, “Resurrection” takes a jolting turn that puts the audience on notice and warns to expect the unexpected ... From that point on, the plot spirals into a ho-hum rehash of tropes risen from the graves of far better zombie films.
COOL AIR (2006)
Devoid of a compelling mystery and lacking any visceral horror, “Cool Air” has no chance of being anything other than a dull and plodding exercise to see if an audience can sit still and remain awake for more than an hour.
THE BATTERY (2012)
While the Woodbury militia storms prison walls and while Tom Savini’s biker gang lays siege to Monroeville Mall, this is how the Average Joes occupy their days during an undead apocalypse.
THE UNBROKEN (2012)
When it comes time to make a list of creepy children from scary films, that roster will include resurrected Gage Creed, the entire Village of the Damned, and the Japanese boy from “The Grudge.” Nowhere on that list will be the overall-clad kid from “The Unbroken.”
9 DAYS (2013)
For horror fans, “9 Days: Whipped, Chained, and Tortured by a Psychopath” packs as much punch as an episode of “My Little Pony.”
AFTERSHOCK (2012)
While “Aftershock” is not quite as catastrophic as its natural disaster namesake, viewers might be in need of humanitarian aid after trudging through a story that crumbles like the concrete walls of a Chilean nightclub during an earthquake. A less colorful way to put it would be to say that there is as much to like in “Aftershock” as there is to dislike.
BLACK ROCK (2012)
“Black Rock” is not entirely fresh, but it knows how to draw out empathy for its characters. And with that comes the tension and the chills.
THE BIG BAD (2011)
“The Big Bad” made me cry. Not from any emotion or drama depicted onscreen, but from the blown out and blurry cinematography that may as well have lit a match and set fire to my eyes.
A HAUNTING AT SILVER FALLS (2013)
There is a pair of creepy ghosts, but aside from a near drowning in a bathtub that may or may not have been a hallucination, nothing truly sinister ever takes place.
NAILBITER (2013)
Far from living up to its title, “Nailbiter” is what a horror movie would be like if Lifetime stopped doing Meredith Baxter domestic violence dramas and dipped its toes into genre cinema.
HAYRIDE (2012)
Do not let the tagline fool you. Leatherface would have something to say about comparing “Hayride” to “Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” And he would say it with far more brutality than “Pitchfork” could ever manage.
ALL THE BOYS LOVE MANDY LANE (2006)
“Mandy Lane” can be entertaining for a spell, even if it is derivative. Watch it after a “Friday the 13th” marathon however, and one is liable to grow bored very quickly.
DARK CIRCLES (2013)
Neither remarkable nor deplorable, “Dark Circles” is simply a mildly entertaining thriller that makes for an 87 minute diversion unlikely to be regretted, but equally unlikely to be remembered.
There's nothing intriguing about watching Eric track down and slaughter stuntmen instead of exacting a deserving vendetta against distinct villains.