July 29th UPDATE: Hey friends, my computer suffered a complete hard drive failure last week on the day before Comic-Con. All of my unpublished reviews were wiped and my system was caught in the repair shop while I was in San Diego, which is why there hasn't been any new content recently. The bad news is the content I had ready was unrecoverable. The good news is my machine is back up. It will still take another day or three to get everything up to speed, but I aim to have new reviews posted as soon as August 1st or no later than August 4th and then Culture Crypt should be back on track after that.
Thanks for your patience and remember to back up your computer regularly! :)
If a parody of Jersey Shore stereotypes framed as a ... slasher movie piques one’s curiosity, it is hard to imagine that “Jersey Shore Massacre” does not meet whatever expectations might come with the concept and a cast that includes Ron Jeremy.
“The Purge” was a narrowly concentrated home invasion horror ... “Anarchy” expands that universe by taking the Purge onto the streets for a more open world look at the widespread effects of the concept.
With only overused gross-outs to fill in the blanks, the film doesn’t offer enough personality to fulfill the promise of its off-the-wall premise.
The material is ultimately so narrow that I can’t help but feel as though “Killer Legends” is like four half-episodes of “48 Hours Mysteries” strung together for a feature-length film.
It doesn’t have anything “new” to say regarding the same human survival scenario that horror has been exploring since Ben and Barbra first went into that Pennsylvania farmhouse in 1968.
Viewers have to prepare for a middling horror anthology that is at least better than “Creepshow 3,” but still leagues below top tier efforts like “V/H/S/2.”
In being so patently rote and broadly bland, it misses out on having any bite, wit, or snap that can otherwise make a mediocre monster movie moderately charming.
... if the dumb hiking woman forced me at gunpoint to watch one of these films again, I would choose “Bunnyman” simply because its idiocy is mildly laughable, whereas the sequel’s is just annoyingly pointless.
“City of Lust” is flawed, occasionally bewildering, and often cheesy. Yet somehow, it has a “je ne sais quoi” appeal I can’t quite put my finger on.
The B-movie interludes are the primary creative hook for the story, and they don’t do anything to increase interest in the film, much less read as authentic period pieces.
“Deep in the Darkness” won’t have you reaching for a pen and paper to write mom a letter, but it is a better thriller from Chiller Films than the usual beast beneath the sea/trees/earth mill runner.
“Oculus” is not a movie about visceral violence or showcasing frights for eyes only. I anticipated thoughtful psychological drama, and that is what “Oculus” delivers in spades.
With production design, sound, and cinematography carefully developed for teeth-clenching mood, ("Inside" crafts) an exquisite horror show of sensational sights featuring horrors both eye-popping and eye-covering.
“Hunting the Legend” has little to show for originality or wow factor, but it does have respectable heart from filmmakers wisely avoiding a reach beyond their means.
... what we have instead is a “nothing more, nothing less” movie about two handfuls of nondescript characters patiently waiting their turns at being eaten alive by a monster with no purpose other than to rend human flesh.
By its end, “Alpha Alert” settles into a groove as an average thriller with a few minor highlights, yet no compelling reason to ever watch or mention it again, if it is even worth seeking out the first time.